Im wearin a dollar bill hat and tgkin a big girl home. Lifi is gmwnd
Brandy, I need a picture of your boobs. Not time to explain.
absolutely not. he will always be that kid that threw up a ham and cheese sandwich in fourth grade to me.
at first I thought it was funny, but looking at it now, it screams "dramatic" and "medicated wipes."
Hey welcome to Rick's drunk text tree. Rick is drunk right now please respond with "shut up" to remove your name from this list. Thanks for playing.
honestly, i'm just crying in the kitchen naked and eating salsa
I have chafed skin from the handy she gave me. I told her that and she said return the favor when it heals. I'm in love.
I bet Billy Ray Cyrus wishes he had pulled out now....
Dude! We had to write our address on your arm in permanent marker so you wouldn't get lost. You just showed the cabbie your arm and he drove you! Nice guy.
Being single is awesome because I can still drink a bottle of wine and hate myself, but I don't have to shave my legs!
So I have been told that I licked your eyebrows last night
On a scale of 1-10 how inappropriate is it for me to ask if Walgreens offers teacher discounts when purchasing a Plan B pill?
She was crying and pulled the collar of her shirt up to blot the tears. And then she just kept her head there. And stopped crying. "My boobs are just too amazing for me to cry." her words not mine please help she's still in that position
he just got here with a handle of tequila and box of condoms. looks like i'll be spending the weekend in bed
According to the rule of quantum porn mechanics, the mere thought of something kinky causes it to exist. So out there, somewhere, there is already riddler/smurf porn...
Randomize
