What are you drinking?
Shitty Coors light. OM NOM NOM TASTES LIKE HIGH SCHOOL
Spaghetti and Car Bombs, good idea or what will end up on the bar in a few minutes?
You took a fire extinguisher off the wall in the hallway to play Ghostbusters.
I always know the weekend is over when the real license comes out and the fake goes back into the hiding spot.
apparently he thought telling me 'the weasel wants to come out to play' would somehow convince me to go down on him
Agreed. And i highly doubt it could be awkward. You do remember our introduction was a direct result of you mentioning your affinity for my genitals, right?
Just sayin. I pissed on his couch, and ruined his stove. If he's not mad, we're partying there every weekend...
Of course I will... FYI I just gave my balls a crew cut.
Please show REO speedwagon ur boobs for me.
It is a fiery spray of napalm-covered beautiful words that leave a flaming "fuck you" on the ground after I destroy him.
I bought emergency contraception until I / we decide how to handle that. And target gave me a gift receipt for it. Awkward.
million dollar idea: razor dispensers in bar bathrooms. your welcome, girls who didn't think they were getting laid tonight.
Just got a handjob in my psych lecture. You were right, going to class is paying off.
First day of school is awesome. I get to meet my students and figure out which of their mothers I’ I’m going to bang
had to remind myself that killing him is not a good career move AGAIN.
Randomize
