Getting fucked up met up rando with a girl I confesswed my love for last night. weird, going with it
But I don't consider them one night stands. They're auditions.
you should just get pregnant. that way you don't need to decide on a career.
Most guys don't get turned on by "skinny, gangly legged girl with glasses laying in bed touching herself." You better start working on your diction if you're gonna keep up the sexting.
DDing is such a bittersweet job, just got the entire history of this girls hookup career
he just used "boss" and "boner" in the same sentence. I cant respond.
Dont be alarmed when you find the maintenance guy passed out on your couch. I didn't to explain why I was there so I offered him a drink, I dont know what happened after that.....
You kept yelling "wood grain wheel" and grinding on fat chicks.
The hell is wrong with me
I AM THERE IN SPIRIT, TICKLING YOUR BALLS
And my coffee table looks like something out of Scarface
there are no losers in shot checkers. only winners.
Some girl woke me up at 1:30 am looking for weed and the next thing I know I'm in a hot tub with 3 girls, 2 40's, and a blunt.
Just so you know. And I'm telling you this because I care deeply for you. Blue raspberry poptarts taste exactly the same as the regular raspberry ones.
I HAVE TOO MICH DICK TALKING TO ME IDK WHAT TO DO.
Being an adult can't be all bad. I just took a vacation day solely to sit around and get stoned
Randomize
