Its like we are women, and boise state is a gangster rap song. This game is degrading
I convinced a girl to do a shot of salsa someone fell through the whole on the porch and Sara swallowed a beer tab
Cumming on a girls face is guy code for you're not wife material.
searching my car for your cum before I have to give my grandma a ride to the airport. Thanks for this
seriously my hangover is so bad I feel like my eye lashes make blinking a workout
It's one of those mornings when I woke up thinking that i really shouldn't have hooked up with my ex boyfriend's girlfriend just to prove a point.
Im in Ft Meyers right now looking right at an alligator. I have had a couple of beers and people are telling me not to feed him but Im gonna do it anyway.
I'm not throwing down for dinner because I plan to have so much tequila I puke it up anyways. How much is a cab home?
Only you could walk of shame to a childrens pirate themed birthday party
Guess who has two thumbs and just fell outta his car and almost peed himself
I'm working on a search warrant...can u pick up box of Chardonnay...I'll give u cash when u get here...
Yea... I love that ur a prosecutor and drink box wine
He told me I was "too flexible." Excuse me?
LMAO I like how "don't worry I'll bring chasers" is your way of assuring things will be ok
Let me just get through this whole court subpoena thing and then ill go back to buying alcohol for minors.
Just broke into the basement of my house via my american red cross blood donor card. I officially save lives
Randomize
