Wedsnesdays are always enlightening. Tonights revealation: One should not smoke from something taller than their person.
Why do you proceed to call me "Queen La Queefah?"
Do you know any thirteen year old jewish kids? I'm looking for a party.
when "blow-job jen" drunk dials you at 3 in the morning, you answer
I was desperate so I downed my birth control with balsamic vinaigrette...
Just did a line with lance bass. Only in NY
My feelings are currently in a sea of vodka and "I don't give a shit"
Aren't they always?
I have a callous on the palm of my hand just below my ring finger that is entirely from opening so many beer bottles. I'm strangely proud right now.
Checked my photo vault today... My self nudie folder is passing the 150 mark.
The weird thing is that you don't send them to anyone. You just keep them for yourself...
I just threw up vodka and hot dogs in a handicapped stall with someone in it who couldn't make me leave because he couldn't walk.
So his 25th anniversary post of love to his wife was almost verbatim what he said to me last week. Does that mean I win or lose?
well i mean, we just followed them into an alien and astronaut party. there was tin foil everywhere
We just had sex on an abandoned logging road while wearing snow shoes. God bless Montana boys.
i like coming up with different names when i reference that night. 'the night i got kicked out of the bar', 'the night i escaped from the hospital', 'the night we had that threeway'...
I bonged champagne. And did keg stands. What in the actual fuck am I doing with my life?
Randomize
