isnt it creepy that our bodies make people
Dude I'm telling you, conditioner is the best for jerking it in the shower. It feels great and afterwards everything is all smooth
In America we eat man semen.
True. She actually gives a fuck. A quality looked down upon if she wants to be one of us
I just found out my college boyfriend's nickname is actually a Dutch word for little cucumber.....it all makes sense now.
Guess who is playing his new drum set when his roommate gets home to teach her a lesson about binge drinking to the point of being taken to the emergency room?
These freshman guys were trying to holler at me from their window, and I realized about 20 minutes too late that the best possible reaction at that time would've been screaming "FLACCID PENIS". Oh, and I found this awesome zombie charm bracelet you would love.
Your feet probs hurt bc the cab driver kicked us out a mile from home after you wouldn't stop screaming "prohibition can suck my dick"
she fell THROUGH the wall. All in all id have to say that my neighbors where pretty chill about it tho.
Drunk wound on my leg hast healed and neither has my dignity
I just smoked weed with my physics professor. Tell me how my life is this.
he just sent me a dick pic, it highly resembled a cheese stick
Then while I was crying on his shoulder, he got a boner. Soo. I kinda just hopped on.
Tonight I researched being a phone sex operator and teaching English at a French school in Africa. I think my future lacks direction
Well he waved at me as he was leaving so he def noticed the staring, and by staring i mean blatant eye fucking from across the bar..
Randomize
