We walked 2 miles, legit 2 miles, and purchased 7 half gallons. One for each of us. Intense
No idea how I passed that sobriety test.
If you borrow your friends real doll, should you wear a condom?
I told him next time he kisses her to remember where that mouth has been...
How'd that go?
Hes on his way with a baseball bat...
thought i was the most hungover person in class until i saw a kid puke into his bookbag...he wins
Ignoring the crisis im in. Sitting in the front yard in a kiddie pool. Wearing arm floaties, fins and a snorkel. Waiting for a hot guy to walk by.
we are still finding bottels filled with his pee. tom almost drank the one in the frig
He bought my favorite ceral.. I've guess I've earn the status as one of his regular fuck buddies. I feel honored and proud. His roommates girls don't get this treatment.
He held back my hair as I puked, then kindly asked me to slightly move my head over and pissed right next to my face.
You can't just be this socially awkward and sexually frustrated and jealous as a fucking demon and be expected to stay sober.
Snow days are when you really appreciate that your neighbor is on your bang roster.
did you just describe your masturbation session as "rad af??"
you asked if you could borrow my vagina for the night
A girl I had a drunken hook up with is on interventon right now
Why can't he see that I don't want a slow getting to know you period? I just want to bone. NOW.
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