i would punch a child for taco bell
My "High Times" magazine came in today, as well as my girlfriend's new sex toys. We're calling in sick today.
i think my mom would be mad if i was pregnant. last time i was she grounded me for a week.
I told him I wanted to have sex to "halleluiah", he suggested the poke-rap.
I knew his night was already over when he started marking lines on the bottle and setting goals
Great. My funeral dress now smells of smoke and disappointing sex.
It's ok. Rob's just shotgunning upside down.
And in my birthday dress, with my friends, i peed on myself in line for the club. Still went in and partied. I remember pieces
A sandwich with pizza as the bread. I love you.
YES WITH THE SQUARE KIND OF SLICES
he has this weird thing where he watches me pee
Just to let you know... If you ever want to get me a gift, the One Direction perfume comes out soon....... It's called Our Moment. It's an appropriate gift for a 25 year old woman.
I'm still me, I just happen to have things in my porn library that you may not have expected
Only you would come out as bi like that
Like I cant decide if he's like autistic or something or just seriously cock blocks himself on purpose with this shit
I just showered and shaved both ankles and one knee because that's the skin that's exposed in the jeans I'm wearing today. Please tell me I'm not the only one who does that.
I should have known it wouldn’t work. Someone saved in her phone as “Subway Sex” called the week before the wedding
Randomize
