Well for one thing, she was eating rice with a shot glass.
Only in college do people pre-game a meteor shower
At victory brunch. Have a decent story. Im now eskimo brother with the duke mens basketball teams from 2002 to 2008 and obamas right hand man
i will be blacked out in the shower. come get me. 20 mins.
Is it possible to have pulled a muscle in my neck from passing out with my head in a bucket?
He just broke up w his most recent gf again, wish I could message her and be like it's not you he's gay.
If I interpreted our horoscopes correctly...you should be coming home with an 8 ball. Just saying.
Im pretty sure by the fifth subway ride after going in circles the four times prior, we all just accepted that we werent making the concert and should instead enjoy our magical weed and tequila laced journey.
Walking through campus with a grocery bag full of pot brownies. I'm like the santa claus of 4/20
You know it's a good weekend when you wake up on Sunday questioning your sexuality.
I'm a bit offended I got no nudies back but it's whatever
They're in the mail. Snapchats too fast. I want the suspense.
Look,the guy had sex w/a Canadian prison guard on the deck of a cruise ship,he could blow any second.
Dude, you kicked in the door to get to a six-person orgy while yelling "I JUST WANT TO LEARN!!"
Dude I am a waste of space, I just febreezed myself so I could go out and get lunch
What color nail polish screams, "Either fuck me or get the hell out of my way"?
Randomize
