Just did free shots of tequila at a walmart. Hello Mexico
Just watched porn on a 60 inch plasma screen TV... So that's where the clitoris is
Please get rnbert tn get chebk h'm in i'm no dead when he getr gome
Also I'm 95 percent positive we ate food naked together
The best part is when you puked in your slurpree and the 7 eleven guy still made you pay for it
I wish I could walk around this campus with a big stamp that says "Approved" and just stamp girls asses as they pass.
Ya these assholes wanted to like sit around and eat cupcakes and watch the notebook. I was like fuck you, I want to go make some people uncomfortable in public.
Piecing together the sordid story from witness accounts and photographic evidence, courtesy of Fcebook. My night included Mojitos, lighting the bar on fire and declaring myself the Queen of Nerds when I stole someone's flashing tiara. Woke up this morning with a velvet cape and plastic scepter to match. Mojitos are awesome!
SORRY! Pervert came out for a bit. BAD PERVERT! BACK IN YOUR HOME!
I just used FaceTime as a look out while I got a blowjob in the library
He had "Bad Bitches Only" tattooed above his dick. I don't know his name but I hope I find him again. I also don't feel that I lived up to the challenge.
We fucked on a kid's slide, my vagina is singing praises of being used
I love how my parents bring water bottles filled with vodka on family trips
sorry about your sharpie. alex wanted to shave the left side of his body so he had me draw a line over him with a ruler
All I remember thinking is, why the fuck are there martians on the ceiling? And they were riding fruit. Like strawberries and shit.
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