I cant wait to get the disapproving look from this elderly black lady...
She has never blacked out. I have tried to get her to so many times. Apparently it's a lot harder than we make it out to be.
Chelsea handler, $19 million - Forbes women top 100. Seriously she shaped her career around her love of vodka. HERO.
still drunk. talking shit to the doc drawing my blood. this has no upside
how many americans can say they have been laid before eating their first big mac?
I really like her...she always overpays me for xanax and still feels the need to fuck me to make up for it....
Why is it that every study session with you turns into a hunt for drugs?
He had a drawn-on fu manchu and now my vagina has one too.
Your the only person to come back from spring break with a non std related infection
I feel like we have a good system here turning our sketchy decisions into great stories.
I don't know man. I fell outside Pizza Hut and an employee had to perform first aid. But I think I got free pizza. So it was worth it.
Just bought a gingerbread house kit and pregnancy tests. Happy holidays.
I just fell down my stairs, guess that's how my sunday is gonna go
We went camping and met these lesbians and now I have S'mores where there shouldn't be S'mores.
You know you've hit a new slutty low when you're simultaneously sexting and having a tea party with a 4 year old
Randomize
