What was that guy's name that you dated that wore the leotard?
omg he said he wants to insert his penis into my vagnia what do i say
tell him to stop quoting family guy
I told her I would melt her with my mustache. Needless to say, he pants were soon off.
her lazy eye was starring daggers at me.
I know im too high when i think porn has an interesting story line.
just woke up to a 10 min voicemail of you singing "99 red ballons".... you need to work on your german..
And i generally try not to roofie people when I'm in a committed relationship.
this guy had a colored tattoo of Chucky on his leg, whatever drugs he does, i want them
By the end of the night i was making legitimate noises not just saying moo.
He kept waking up periodically throughtout the night to bit my ear and pass back out.
With your fertility you would just get contact pregnant
Dude, for twins they have shockingly different blowjob styles.
STOP FUCKING MY SISTERS!!!!
Whiskey chased with ice cubes? Here's a big FUCK THAT to that
Yeah but if you conceived a child on a park slide that would be pretty awesome
At some point the phrase "I've hit rock bottom" stopped having a meaning and became my general state of life
Randomize
