i think he might wanna be bffs again, but idk cause we're friends again but we haven't been bff since like a year. i don't know what to think...
wow. what a nail bitter. i need popcorn for this. brb
Omg my grandpa just told me he wants to die in his 90's shot by a jealous husband
ASIANS HAVE SEX TOO!! I just watched it happen in the library.
Gentleman, we have a new medal category - number of women per day in apartment WITHOUT FURNITURE
I guess I gave him a 20 minute play-by-play of the first three sections of R. Kelly's 'trapped in a closet.'
He asked me if I could call his penis destroyer... Uhh SOS.
My face is tingly. And my legs are being massaged by golden elves.
I just saw him carrying his little sister while walking his puppy. And he was shirtless. I swear my ovaries just exploded
I have a surprise for you guys
What is it?
A MOTHER FUCKING SURPRISE DON'T ASK QUESTIONS
There should be a rule. If your dick is under 6 inches, you are not allowed to dress as Thor.
I just tried to make cleaning gasoline off your shoes with toilet paper in the Chemistry Building bathroom look normal. I failed.
the bad thing about being great at twerking is that I'm powerless to stop myself from doing it when I'm drunk and in public.
I'm 99% sure I just flashed my dad with my vagina. So that's the new low now.
I know right. I don't even want to have sex today. I did anyway but that's besides the point.
You're having marijuana delivered to you. You're buying drugs and you aren't even leaving the house. I'm sure he'll be surprised if you're NOT wearing a bathrobe.
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