She seriously needs to find another hobby other than bouncing on cock.
she was so ugly that the sight of her made me shiver and then i had to play it off like a draft blew by that only i felt.
smoked weed with Joakim Noah last night....if he was half as fast to the basket as he is to grab a joint from me we'd have another championship on our hands
I have show me your genitals stuck in my head. Except in spanish. Muestrame tus genitals. Tus genitals.
All the walks of shame were condensed into the hour before parents started showing up. Move out day is so bittersweet
Only you could be admitted to the ER and walk out with a nurse's phone number. I wish I was gay
I really thought you were going to tell me you were pregnant on facebook chat. FACEBOOK CHAT. I almost cried.
I fucked her and then she made me sleep on the floor next to her bed because she 'has a committment problem'
Just drove past the dude that came in your sock
On the oral sex Super Bowl board I drew 7 and 1. If I get lucky, someone will be swallowing during Madonna's half time. I'm sure she'd approve.
ive penciled you in for a day of excessive drinking
You know you are high when you are so glad it wasn't your freshly buttered raisin bread that fell on your foot. It was your $400 Ipod
We need a hype man... Like a DMX type dude to just up the ante constantly...
woke with Taco Bell next to me in bed and people's shoe sizes written on my arm.
yeah i'm making him "thanks for letting me befriend your toilet" cookies. wanna help? i'm sure you'll be making new friends too.
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