It's pouring out. I am cold, wet, and miserable.... Kind of reminds me of our sleepover last night.
I can't ever handle being "that girl" again. At least not until next semester.
I farted on Jack's balls last night. He got pissed and walked away cause he knew it was on purpose. I couldn't hold it in anymore.
You were in the garage half naked counting your ribs and talking about how you had too many
She should get an extra 30 days for that Georgia Rule movie......terrible.
i asked if you wanted help changing your sheets after you threw up in bed. you politely declined. i take no responsibility after that.
You called in. Quitter. You stayed at home naked drinking again didnt you.
You slammed your face into the toilet and declared you were moving your bed into the bathroom in the morning. Also, you insisted on crawling everywhere because feet are "overrated."
Using our apartments online floor/space planner to see how many beer pong tables we can fit. Dont think they had this in mind when they put this thing online.
Probably not lol but were fitting as many as possible
And I told him that even though were not together, if he has sex with anyone I would have sex with someone else, video tape it and send it to him.
He literally said I should watch game of thrones while I was blowing him like is this the conversation you want to be having right now
I think I used my NERF gun during sexual roleplay. Need to re-evaluate my life choices.
The girl in line in front of me at the grocery store is buying wine, m&m minis, a toothbrush, and condoms. Is it inappropriate to high-five her?
I actually talked to his parents last night about it. haha. I had a bottle of smirnoff in my hand, I'm sure they took me serious.
You told him he “could park his dick in your garage”.
Well he didn’t. It shouldn’t be this hard to get a penis.
Randomize
