It was just so hard to get through Conan without crying like a baby. I'm just so proud of him.
I would make tea from her tampons just to see her tits
I don't know where I am, but its a Goosebumps novel waiting to happen.
I just had the ultimate walk of shame. I'm barefoot, in his gym short with vomit in my hair and I walked half a mile through campus. At noon. Thanks for picking up ur phone
you should have heard her the other night. no sentence related to one preceding it. it was like she was in etch a sketch and when she moved she forgot everythin
just got a rotting pancake and bacon in the mail from your address....
I'm sorry I kept calling last night when you wouldn't pick up. I'm REALLY sorry I sang "You Oughta Know" on more than 4 voice mails.
This is so pathetic it makes me miss snorting lines alone in my room listening to 'one more drink'.
I have fiberglass splinters all over my hands and woke up with a sign that says PUMPKINS in my room.
Idk man I'm just a giant talking marshmallow ready to be toasted and dipped in chocolate
He came over in a blaze orange vest with a case of beer and a shotgun yelling about "Dove Season" then passed out in the lawn. There he lies
My philosophy is thug life and that means never having to say your sorry for stealing drinks off tables
He snorted adderall on my table. I have a feeling he's not trying to buy me flowers
does 2pm fall under the wake n bake category?
How does it make you feel that I can't control my vagina around you?
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