I see my mary-anne walkin' awa-y-y! Bow Nahw now new, ne ne ne ne ne, ne ne nehw, ne ne new new Nah dan ah bwawn-now, ba bwan'll buh dada bwiddly doo.
That was supposed to be me air guitaring the solo from More than A Feeling
all we ever talk about is how much i like your dick or my drug problem.
Wine smoothie.... Not as good as I thought it would be
I making dinner, so you might want to actually come home tonight.
oh, you finally did the dishes then?
No, bought new ones.
Just opened a beer with eyelash curlers... miss you.
apparently i was just sitting there with my shirt down holding my boobs saying "its ok. its all gonna be ok"
gross. I think i'll just donate all my eggs. My children will be incredible, but they're not welcome in my womb
Hne relally is a cite oerfect gome. Nes awddddddddooooome.
You could have chosen coming to fuck me over getting too hammered to drive. But you made your bed, and now you get to jack off alone in it.
We got back from Mcdonalds and literally 5 minutes of being in your room, you wanted to go back because "We haven't been yet."
yeah the cable guy is coming and everybody is hiding all the pieces in the house. we are up to thirty two. like a fun game of smokable scavener hunt.
What I'm saying is DOWNGRADE. Like, do you see the caps lock?
He'll only communicate through snapchat with pictures of him holding his cat or his dick. Bit of Russian roulette opening them in public but I did it anyway.
Being an adult is fun. You can experience a break up, then go fuck someone else in the woods.
I drunkenly said, "That's my future father-in-law!" And everyone made an uncomfortable / disgusted face... including the aforementioined future father-in-law. Maybe I should start dating other people.
Randomize
