Alls I know is that his gf looked like Beyonce and he looked like Babar
So the last day on the vacation I woke up in the bath tub. My mom said she asked me during the night what I was doing and I said, "swimming."
Im handcuffed to some kid i hardly know. there are no cops involved
They left shortly after you claimed the dirty rug as your mattress and began alternating between singing "Dayman" and "Nightman"
can i drink enough to forget this semester even happened?
This kid is drunk.
I hope by "this kid" you mean yourself and not some child you have kidnapped and gotten wasted.
Just realized the fur coat I am wearing to the wedding is the one I had sex with the groom in
I can't begin to describe what I look like walking through the grocery store with this outfit and chocolate syrup.
Also, you tried to make me learn all of the presidents, in order, with a picture book as an aid. At 4 am. What the fuck?
Apparently love is stronger than SoCo
you are dancing on the line between undergrad and alcoholic.
Walk of shame: Easter Edition. He is risen.
So when this rash is gone wanna hang out?
I woke up in your kitchen with my ID in my hand and my nails were painted electric blue. Dude.... never let me have fireball again.
Just got done being naked and Mooning the cops. I'm still alive. Let's drink.
Randomize
