The worlds most fuckable chipmunk
I prob couldn't even get his attention if I had a dick growing out of my forehead
friends don't put videos of other friends on youtube puking on their professor on the first day
I just conducted a skype meeting drunk and in the middle of a cornfield. I don't even think they noticed.
apparently, dueling with garden tools in Home Depot is strictly frowned upon
2 hours later, she made her cat watch the waterfall scene from Homeward Bound to teach her how good she has it here.
Also I played a weird game of chicken in the ladies room at work between myself the person pooping 2 stalls over and a very determined maintenance man.
I fell in the river last night. The allegheny to be exact. Omg getting drunk at work gatherings is dangerous
I'm in your room because it's a safe space. Is it ok to pee in here?
Better safe and shitfaced than hungover and in need of another surgery.
Nahh no judgin. Compliments to the balls are always heartfelt
This is my punishment for trynna have a festive time with a stranger. I always forget you can't get weird with one night stands
My roommate told me he found me naked in the shower puking and when he asked why I was naked I said "you can't wear clothes in a shower"
Getting high with your mom, but thinking of you!
My brain is like a TV with 10 channels, 9 of them are static and the other one just plays that one Nagito Komaeda edit on loop 24/7
Randomize
