An ex-gang member just asked me out on a date via note. And spelled dinner wrong. Win?
No idea how i never noticed that penis before. I wonder if it works
dude sorry but u no that when a guys 'likes' ur pic on facebook it only means he was just jacking off to it.
She used the introduce me to her roommates so she could find out my name trick the next morning..I may be in love.
There are regrets in my world today- mostly jager at that fucking altitude
I'm fighting fire with fire. When my parents interrogate me about what I was doing last night, I tell them the truth. Every disgusting, awkward detail. I'm 23 now and they need to get used to it.
Ed's in which sucks about a thousand cocks... But thats 1800 less than working with Alex so it's gonna be a good day
He just told me what he wants for his birthday. "a noise complaint" he also said he wants to be the cause of all the noise but he won't be the one making the noise.
I just picked up my phone and one shoe from the man mowing the lawn next to the ice rink. He found them in a tree.
The notary thing was a good idea. I can charge $2 per signature. I'm currently being paid in beer.
You sat on me. Like I was a toilet. While I was on the toilet. You peed a little.
while giving me head, she stopped, looked up at me smiling and said "ill never be able to look at bananas the same way again" and then went back to work.
Where is everybody?
It's pretty much split between the strip club and jail.
he called her and asked for me. he wants to do dinner and a movie
her booty call wants to take you to dinner?
Was cussing out our DD when one of the strippers takes him backstage. WTF
They call him magic hands is all I know.
Somethings are best left a mystery
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