could you grab mr moo while you're at his apt?
you brought your stuffed animal to a booty call?
He sent me $300 worth of sex toys. My clitoris went into hiding after two days.
frozen drink friday is suspended until further notice
i have a feeling i am the only one who can successfully pull off the "slutty kentucky derby" look.
exactly. I want him to have to live with the fact that he fucked me. I want him to look me in the eye and say "you were a drunken mistake".
you said you didn't want to carry the pizza box so just folded up the pizza and put it in your pocket
Is it morally wrong to give today's hookup a Krispy Kreme from yesterday's hookup or is it just fat love?
I'm at the bar, forgot my pants. Everyone's over reacting
I'm the kind of girl who misses her mouth when trying to eat, do you honestly think I'm coordinated enough to wear heels during sex?
I thought he was foreign, but it turns out when you're that drunk, an Ohio accent just sounds Russian.
You're either getting fucked or a coupon to Friendly's. I haven't decided yet.
What happened last night dude?
YOU SHIT ON MY FUCKING COFFE TABLE THATS WHAT FUCKING HAPPENED!!!
I don’t know if I’m nauseous or just disgusted with myself.
Who brings a stripper to breakfast at the dining hall? What was the plan? Impress her with his meal plan?
At this point, I would not mind getting hit by a truck. It would mean I could get this over with quicker.
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