i just spit dirty mouth water on my dentist. and apparently grinning sheepishly and saying "my b" doesn't make it better
SOME GIRL GOT MAGGOTS IN HER COOCH FROM EXPERIMENTING WITH MAYO!
I am about to be in my happy place. (the shower with a 6 pack)
i wish i could swallow nair and shit it out and it would get rid of all my ass hair.
Not exactly sure why you felt the need to get the halloween decorations out. But waking up to 7 carved pumpkins really scares the shit out of you.
I'm drinking beergaritas with a dog who is high and a baby
your completely serious
this is not the first time I've had hot dogs and 151 for thanksgiving.
The drag queen we did coke with is going to be on Ru Paul's drag race. I feel so proud.
If someone told me one person in the department was secretly a death eater, I would suspect her, no contest.
Just for once I'd like my first interaction with a new GP to not be an obvious sex injury.
STOP BUYING ALADDIN PANTS WITH MY AMAZON CREDIT CARD
She just. Cock slapped me. With string cheese.
He was shirtless in my yard saying he was jesus
How'd things go with that guy last night?
He threw up in the consol in my car then started crying about his ex girlfriend.
I forgot to bring soap and all I could find here was body wash. It's like bathing with laundry detergent.
Randomize
