Bts the comment you were making during that picture was "look we have penises"
How bad was it?
You ran around telling everyone that you were going to click them to death on google earth
Nights like last night are what makes cleaning up the vomit in the morning worth it
I love my penis, it thinks for me sometimes
Where can I buy a trophy for a Groupie Award?
She had sex with a merch guy. . . band guys make you groupies, Merch guys just means she's easy.
On my way home right now. I miss you. let's cuddle. whiskey.
there was this guy running across campus barefoot in the pouring rain stepping in all the puddles. i want his life. and i want to be stripper.
It's barely 9 am & I've already had an ice cube IN my vagina
Trust me that one dick you don't want. It's like a whale... That's swam too many oceans...
All I really remember is shouting "THANKS FOR LETTING ME MAKE OUT WITH YOUR GIRLFRIEND."
What can I say? You have this amazing power over straight girls.
So....I just took a paddle fan on high speed to the side of the head while getting head...still finished the job, good thing I'm drunk and couldn't feel it.
This is possibly the most humiliating moment of my life. I have diarrhea, in a port-a-potty, at the Renaissance Festival.
we are eating waffles in the pillow fort. Still think you're too straight for a threesome?
I'll be right over.
Giiirrrllll. Back to back snaps of dicks. Two different guys sent me their dick at the same time. This is totally what our founding fathers meant with life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness.
In other news, my ex fuck buddy is a surprisingly good wingman.
Randomize
