he quoted Bring It On. It's over.
apparentely "Beer Pong Champ" is not a profession, no wonder they havent called me back......
told ya
My entire childhood was an ugly sweater party
I fucked her on my hockey bag. it doesnt get any more Canadian than that.
Going to eat lunch. Bunch of people in church clothes, and we are hungover, wearing pajamas, and in real danger of puking on the floor. We're about to destroy the ambience of this joint.
the girl I was having sex with just mumbled victory for msu during sex. i love basketball season
Just turned my microbiology homework into a drinking game. The words are getting blurry but I think we're really bonding.
my facebook is like a giant collection of my one night stands
Got blown by one of the bridesmaids. Family BBQ today. They all know. Talk about awkward.
i came on her dog
I am going to dream of scrotums tonight, I just know it.
It felt as i were a pad of butter melting onto a piece of toast.
got a blowjob in the bar bathroom, got arrested for public intoxication, and found a big bag of weed on the ground on my walk home from the station. my friday night could have been a movie
Okay so I'm high eating chili cheese fries bra-less watching Mulan, could I be doing any better at life right now?
hey, i didnt think i could be this stupid either but you dont see ME getting all judgemental about it
Randomize
