So she puts out... but it wasn't worth it
I'm half single.
Please tell me it's the bottom half.
It was all fun and games until Tim shit on the end table
Im dancing with my grandma to Low right now at the wedding. There's no coming back from this.
Fact: The drinking you do in college doesn't affect your liver in real life.
The view from the bathroom floor this morning is fabulous
I drunkenly asked a stripper to join our volleyball team.
i get drunk faster, i spend less money on food, and i'm losing a shit ton of weight. depression and its pills are doing wonders for me
No, your dick is problems. Anyone you fuck haunts us for the rest of the semester. If you need to get laid, I'll personally drive you out of state.
Will that be creepy to wake him up at midnight with my tongue all over his body??
I'm surprised I don't have a permanent face imprint between my boobs.
My one night stand just messaged me and said he is praying for me...
I am going to go back to drinking and listneing to Hanson now. Maybe crying. Or perhaps Full House reruns
You have to get it done early. Like a dick drive by. Hit it and run.
Just FYI: if you happen to notice a liquid of some sort on my kitchen counter with an interesting color/ texture, don't taste it
Randomize