Getting food. Want anything?
Vagina. Double meat no buns. I have the secret sauce
Last thing I remember was you straddling a guy in a wheelchair on the dance floor.
The cab driver thought we were passed out so he called a sexline...
I'll be listening to "I will always love you" and sobbing uncontrollably all night, care to join?
It's all good. Going back to my room to try and air out my balls.
What if we made a bunch of weed butter and then poured the butter into tiny rectangular molds and then chilled it so it was solid again and then wrapped it with the tin foil wrapping from restaurant butter and then left them at restaurants and wreaked utter havoc.
The fact that I took a nap during my midterm shows exactly how I handle being an adult
I think it would be reallllly cool if you took your best friend to work so she doesnt have to have an awkward cab ride with the driver she drunkenly made out with last night ...
No sorry. I may be a happy drunk but my gag reflux is an angry drunk.
The last thing I remember is talking to the firefighter next to me and he was giving me fruit.
All this studying of HIV makes me want to have sex with you.
Hey beautiful no judgement but why is there a bucket of KFC chicken in the bathtub??
You spilt a drink on my couch, then used my dog to mop it up... you called her a mop dog, repeatedly
So I came to the conclusion that who ever pour my ever clear out saved my life
as a self proclaimed hoe im ok with a lotta things but that is not fucking one of them
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