We have to go find her fucking car. She came home from a 80 dollar cab ride, no shoes, and all she remembers is its at a burger king on a street with an H in it
he then started listing things that have been up his butt, never drinking in boys town again
We made a percocet pizza. And then i made an unfortunate decision.
It was odd. His friends dick tasted the same as his. Friends are beginning to have to much in common
I'm 2 blowjobs away from girlfriend status....don't tell me I don't know how to have an adult relationship
he has been on a 2 week bender, has been homeless for a week and a half, and leaves for madagascar in 2 days. Do we worry or is that normal?
what's the name of the guy at the bank you blew to get the lower interest rate?
um. wrong number, but good luck with your loan
It's home.......I'm going to the store in disguise to get skittles and cake frosting. Then I'll eat the frosting in a dark corner while I cry and wonder what I did to deserve this.
don't pay it forward
I eont pay shit forward. told a stranger to call an abulance and peaced
Someone got day drunk, but I'm not saying who.
It was me.
Out of all the people in the house to show their tits at mcdonalds to try and get free food, they picked those two?
How many drinks/blunt hits do you think I could get if I wore an "it's my birthday" shirt
THIS IS NOT A DECISION I MADE AT ONE IN THE MORNING IM JUST GETTING AROUND TO TELLING YOU ABOUT IT NOW
I WANT PIZZA BUT I ALSO WANT SELF ESTEEM
BUT LIKE WHO AM I TO EVER CARE ABOUT SELF ESTEEM
Ended up at the strip club, got told I should be a dancer 4 times, got free tacos and my hot TA slide in the dms. How was your night?
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