I'm on that like soy sauce on rice
Yours is on the dinner table...mine is in my underwear drawer.
i was just lookin through my fb pics and i think im with a cat in like 40% of them..: how sad is my life
i hate that site..its like every vagina you dont wanna see
I was surprised he admitted he couldnt keep up. We both knew but usually they dont come out and say it
she said we were using the spray butter as air freshener
I should start an etsy shop with all the jewelry and clothes women leave at my house
My liver was like a college freshman on spring break. It would've danced topless on tables if it could have.
DR UNK TOWN USA
TEAM USA GO AMERICA
2 hours later, she made her cat watch the waterfall scene from Homeward Bound to teach her how good she has it here.
Relaxed was like phase 1 of this phase 7 high
Eredayimstrugglin ..Can we talk about the fact that I just typed "er" and it autocorrected to that. Fuck my life.
do you ever wish you could like, jerk your heart off and be, like, emotionally satisfied? it'd feel like cuddling.
I'm a grown ass woman, I need to get fucked
just saw those girls we met the other night. i happen to be wearing a bunny suit and driving your smart car. i think its safe to say thats a no go situation.
Randomize
