You kept buying everyone Washington apple shots, and telling us we needed to support local produce.
We followed the campus tour around in a golf cart drinking PBR and blasting "Sexual Healing."
okay. so this hammed chick got arrested and she keeps trying to make out with the cop. i like her style.
I keep reminding myself that my vagina isn't a homeless shelter.
Well I almost walked away with an Irish guy's boarding pass and some south guy's dignity
Also, if you all get arrested i'm coming to laugh at you because i don't have the money for bail.
Yeah. I had to take off my shirt. It's soaked in weakness.
Please come home, i don't want to feel like basket garbage girl but I'm in your alleyway and not sure how to change that.
I just remember looking over and seeing you on top of him and us high fiving. That's when I knew we'd be perfect roommates
Celebrated the veterans I suppose, my mouth tastes of gin and black outs
His legs actually look hot in that dress. He might even make a better girl than Josh
This may be a weird question to ask someone who is 21 years old, but are you grounded?
I gave him head while despicable me 2 played in the background. I think I disappointed the minions
He fell asleep during FOREPLAY. Sober!!!
Im outta here as soon as my phone charges wtf
What is it in my brain that makes me look at a penis and think "that belongs in my mouth"?
Randomize
