We went out. i got lost. dunno where they were. they slept in the car. i slept in an outdoor shower. i dont know anything else.
Just saw a woman in a hospital gown with a Steelers jersey on top smoking a cigarette while hooked up to an IV outside of the hospital. I love Pittsburgh.
He gave me his number and said the usual call whenever you need someone but then was like... or just call me.
You would pick up a guy in AA.
The gym has a pool
my gym membership just went from "way to get in shape" to "place to go swim when I'm high"
You blinded her by spitting vodka in her eyes, the vodka you had just taken as a body shot off of her.
At least he's enough of a gentleman to not make me do the walk of shame dressed as Santa.
I paused mid sex to tell him I wished I'd taken up barrel racing so I could ride better.
Gina was bawling her eyes out and then she ran into the street and peed. she kept screaming "LOOK WHAT YOUVE DONE TO ME"
I even got my dealer to make gluten free special cookies ;-)
So... crashing at the hot bartender's place is not a solid marital decision.
I told her I wanted to use him as a chew toy while simultaneously licking his face.
Did she tell him? And if so, was he cool with it? If yes, date him, date the fuck outta him.
Our motto for the night: BLACK OUT OR BACK OUT.
That's our motto every night.
i feel like when you brought up the possibility of you getting pregnant the sexting is over
Never let me go online shopping while drunk. I now own 2 baby cribs. I have no children
How many times do I have to tell you I'm not bisexual.
.....unless there is alcohol involved
Randomize
