I think my tv knows when im high and tells taco bell
small problem..I have a major exam in the morning so I might have to go to the library after the party
so no drinking for you?
don't be silly
I managed to convince my mom that my hickey was a birth mark I have always had. She cried for an hour about being a terrible mother for never noticing it.
This flask doesn't match my outfit. I hope the gays don't mind.
So... he formspringed me a link to every nude pic ive taken since he 8th grade. ive evolved nicely. but im nervous as to how this a website.
Do you think I could put your penis on reserve for tonight or tomorrow night?
sleeping in bed with your booty calls married sister...you're the stuff heroes are made of.
What kind of a birthday party isn't a get drunk and ruin everything party
Im playing lifeguard in my own bathroom. How's ur night?
why is there a broken handcuff locked to the ceiling fan
You went in the back with her.. And honestly I couldn't tell her neck from her tits man..
I'm spending my Sunday wishing the entire Patriots offense would let me touch their manhood
I think you should do the fixer upper relationship. Like lawyers do pro bono work with underserved populations, you can do pro bono relationship work.
I have a hook up buddy in Abiquiu. He lives next to a Chipotle; that's the only reason I see him.
So your telling me I can lick your ass but you CAN'T spend my money
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