ally, we are sitting by a fire and you are totally hot. no pun intended
just gave a homeless man a kiss in exchange for two handles
exact location. now.
Clearly I made an impression.
Or at least your vagina did.
I negotiated the purchase of an entire tray of like 50 jello shots for $8.
just found $310, wrapped in a rubber band, at the bottom of my sock drawer with a note attached stating, "Make it rain".
The vodka told me to go iceskating on my frozen pool. I may have attempted.
Pretty sure i didnt get thrown out cause why dont i have more bloody areas
what are we doing this weekend?
I have enough booze to get us through Armageddon...which basically means that on Sunday we will have to make a trip to the liquor store.
Pretty sure I scared him off for good. The lesbian in me is ecstatic.
Yea he doesn't really know about any of this yet but my game plan is to keep wowing him with my vagina and cooking skills. It's up too future me to handle the rest.
Is a 'Dr. Willy Fister Gynecologist' costume appropriate for work?
Just had the best idea EVER: start a mead brewing/dispensery business! WE CAN BREW IT IN MY GIANT CLOSET, AND NEVER BE SOBER AGAIN.
I just used a box o wine to refill a bottle o wine to more effectively drunk clean
The Lion King Is on YouTube
Until 2 minutes ago I actually had a chance to pass my midterms... thanks alot
Alex thinks he can revoke my dick privileges haha.
Isn't he the one getting all the privileges ?
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