Came home to a chalk baord that read:" Think like a rapist." Can't say I'm surpirsed.
Now that I'm the boss, there's nobody to yell at me for smelling like a bar in the morning.
so far i wrote 500 words for a paper on sean paul performing we be burnin..i can officially do anything on adderral
i may or may not have just grinded on your dog thinking it was my boyfriend
Today was the day I stopped kidding myself and started buying the handle of vodka.
gettin drunk isnt as much fun when i can use my own id for it
He bought me Ben & Jerrys and then apologized for the fact that he was going to fall asleep before we could have sex
There was a bottle of vodka and chips in a vase next to the bed
we all took turns holding you up and pretending that you were simba and that we were presenting you to the jungle
At my eighteen year old cousin's wedding. Getting hit on by a 9 year old. No one knows who he came with. I'm pretty sure he just showed up from the field behind the church. Help.
im in the library and there's this guy on a computer just staring at a google image of beer. finals week is rough.
I just want someone to put their head on my boobs and laugh at my jokes ....
I'm gonna do it. I'm gonna write gay mortal kombat fanfic. May the gods be praised for whisky
I wanted to say "you're a souless cunt" but in a nice way. So I added a smiley face.
I feel like with a dick like that he could of done more with it
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