Im partying with a unicorn. You don't even know.
she made out with a stripper. how was scrabble night with your girlfriend
there is a strobe light in my taxi. in what way is this safe.
Pretty sure I blacked out the last 48 hours, the last thing I remember is the 4 pm bar crawl on Thurs
Can you believe they're going to let me be a doctor?
In case any of you were wondering, kyle is alive. He also intends to do the same thing tommorow night and the night after.Goodnight everyone
He had a tramp stamp of his own phone number. You can't tell me that isn't smart.
He told me my outfit made me look like a twelve year old then proceeded with "but you don't look like a whore"
Watched twin sisters make out thought it was amazing sick on their part but legit to watch
I am about five seconds from ripping off my clothes and throwing myself into the ocean to become a mermaid
Just please try not to piss Danny off, I really can't afford to find a new drug dealer again
I just mixed tangerine juice with sauv blanc. on an unrelated note, my episide of intervention is slated to run in April.
Fuck you. Fuck this party. I just wanted to be pretty with a cute little tiara and boys sucking my tits, now i have a hangman game drawn on my face and jello shots in my hair.
I wanted to give you a great birthday party. You know I did.
Bootycalls can't go limp that's like against the law
the guy had "bad bitches only" tattooed above his penis...
He ate me out in a limo while we were driving home. I love bars being open again!
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