Im a photoshop master, i successfully reduced the size of the pupils of all the girls I made out last night with to prove they were not that drunk. So glad the camera goes home with me.
Just saw a guy from Kansas and a guy from Nebraska arguing over who had less of an accent. God Bless the Midwest.
i cant remember past the part when we filled his tub with skittles.
I passed out in the VIP room and she charged me for 17 songs until I woke up, theres a bouncer asking me for $700, fuck tequila
You know you have a great job when you need a DD home from work at 6pm.
I feel like a cloud. A cloud that wants to be laid.
Well there is another shower in Nov. So I have three months to figure out how to get some drunk space fucking. May need some of your mead
That does it. We're drinking til we're pirates.
We were tripping too hard to figure out to tell him where we were so we sent a picture of me laying outside the tent saying "find us"
have you ever seen all dogs go to heaven this is important
Fun Fact: I do not remember what its like to be sober between drinking off and on for two weeks at my "vacation" and being on painkillers for my mouth now
Well you were listening to music and having sex really loudly. How was I supposed to know you'd hear me making rocket sounds?
He smacked my ass so hard my ass cheek looks like Wilson from Cast Away
I know that you sometimes make decisions based on comedic effect, but losing your virginity shouldn't be one of them.
I just took a picture of Austin's dick wearing a hat. Except its not a hat it's a DayQuil cap.
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