he's drinking at 8 in the morning. it's going to be one of those "or else the terrorists have won" kinda days
he knocked over the vodka and juice...picks up the cup and says "yes", takes the last sip...doesnt even worry about the mess all over the floor and we continue having sex.
He insisted on us having sex while watching the biggest loser and asked me if I could "resist the temptation".
Did I send you an asleep facebook message about the upcoming football season titled 'BRILLIANT' at 4:45 this morning?
she crawled under her car and passed out. Unfortunately her feet were sticking out and someone called 911 because they thought she had been run over.
I'm so hungover I literally am considering drinking from the fishtank to avoid getting out of bed.
His new place is a molesden. Like a hole in the ground. It's frightening how oddly private it is.
It rubs the lotion on it's foreskin...
Why didn't you tell me I was calling her by her sisters name all night?
Just dodged a state trooper, your weed will be there shortly. Fear the unbustable!
Maybe. I want to have sex at the fire station, most likely on one of the trucks. I wonder if I can finagle that before I tire of the spelling and grammatical errors in his texts.
His pick-up lines are quotes from Doctor Who. Of course I fucked him.
why isn't there a kind of gay where i let guys give me head but they don't expect me to give it back? i could be that kind of gay
He was that good?
They left around 10:00 this morning. I've been naked since 10:01.
I was mad at him...then I jerked off. Now I'm over it. Orgasms fix everything, I swear.
tell me about the eggs
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