I love my bros weed
Im gonna hate it in like 20 mins though
Just threw up off a chairlift. my life is now complete.
Before I left in the morning I deleted her purity ring app off her iPod, I figured it would save her the shame
i dont think the girl sending me nudes is qualified to pass judgement on me
We found a swing set....it's in the front yard.
The bald eagles cry cause u drink canadian beer.
Just made out with a girl I dated in high school, and she told me her girlfriend likes me. I like where this is going.
Definitely worth waiting her kid to got to sleep when the first thing you hear once she's back is "I want you in my ass right now"
If I was 5 years younger and single...
She STILL wouldn't fuck you.
Im currently watching two girls making out. In the library. Hope your studying is going as good as mine is. Haha
Pretty sure I just puked up sand. And nothing else.
I just did a walk of shame on my own block. one of the old neighbors saw and greeted me "good morning, girl next door"
He's a Republican and an Ohio State fan idk how far this can go.
Open the door and I will lure them out to freedom with viagra and candy orange slices. You know they love that shit.
I booty texted him nothing but three exclamation points at 3:05am and he was in my bed 17 minutes later, lest you think punctuation is not important.
Randomize
