all ten of us were sitting in his room with the lights off and staring at his colorful moving screensaver for two hours. That high.
so we have officially lost him as of 7 hours ago.. already called campus security, the drunk tank and the hospital. figure he'll turn up eventually..
i'll start checking the bushes on campus.
Defiantly just threw away our yearly bottle collection in front of the campus tour. The school should pay me for recruitment
There is a woman in the bar breastfeeding a baby. Doing shots. Gotta love maryland Applebees.
Puking green right now......... jaimison mcflurry very bad idea
we got 12 live crabs and then we got really stoned and know we're playing with the crabs. thats nom watermellon nom. now i'm plaing with a crap whos such a gentleman
i'm having the hardest time convincing my roommates to go dumpster diving for pizza with me. i really miss you..
Oh my god. I just realized something amazing. If I get pregnant with a boy, that technically means I have a penis right??????
Only sluts go out in this weather carpe diem boys
Two dicks, one me.
Yoga's definitely paying off.
New fuck buddy and long time fuck buddy are carpooling home for thanksgiving. #10hrconvoaboutmyblowjobskills
didn't prepare for this snow storm at all. i only have like 6 beer and all my booty calls already went home for the holiday. this is bull.
During my first week as an adjunct prof, I played a fiercely fought game of squash with a law student and we wound up having hot, sweaty, angry sex right on the floor of the court. She is either the best or worst thing to happen to my academic career. Will let you know.
If we were unicorns we would fly together. Like in a pack. A pack of flying unicorns
It was only a blow job in his car. It's the same as giving a friend a back rub.
Randomize
