It says i should accept HIV aids as my friend on facebook.We have 12 friends in common. I need new friends.
just when i thought i had forgotten how badthe sex was he comes across campus solely to say hi
There's an official council for his ex boyfriends. They told me they 'look forward to the day I join them'.
i yelled at him for a little and we ended up fucking in a random tennis court.
I think I'm about to have sex with a second person before noon hehehhe! You're welcome America.
Hefty paycheck and not get wasted can't exist in the same night
She's comparing the feel of breasts to shredded cabbage. Weirdest. Grandmother. Ever.
Not good... He ate my chips. Thats not a sex analogy for anything. My actual potato chips... gone. I lost on both ends.
He's the only guy without a tacky accent I've seen in this southern dump in 6 months. Bangage was inevitable.
You're such a Yankee.
I will have you know I turned Latino David Arquette down for sex because he's married. Total. Moral. Victory.
Flo's in town, ain't she.
I knew you were cut off when you tried to order a "Phil Collins"
I DID NOT GO INTO HOURS OF STRENUOUS LABOR FOR YOU TO LOOK LIKE A DOMINATRIX BARMAID ON A WEEKDAY. AT LEAST SAVE IT FOR THE WEEKEND GDI.
I let him stay at my place since i had to work early and when i got home there was a fruit snack wrapper in my bed. I dont have any fruit snacks. Which means he brought his own fruit snacks to the fuck session.
please don't forget about the bread in the toilet i am absolutely not dealing with that
I've decided it's okay if I take a pregnancy test every month. Then I can be like, "Good job, self, way to not procreate this month!"
Randomize
