And then I watched some old guy get arrested for meeting some other old guy for a blow job. It was epic.
Omg I just met another drunk guy that is teaching me karate
Just saw a dude in a banana costume get beat down by a one shoed black dude wearing a kilt...paninis is such a shit show after 10 on a Saturday
If i had 4 hands right now is have booze in 3 of them and my cock in the other all because you went to denver. just sayin.
So who won the naked front yard Olympics last night?
Well my tits are spray painted gold & i have what i think r the Olympic rings shaved in my vag !!!!!!!SO its safe to say i won something ....
I'm thinking about slathering myself with peanut butter and going to the dog park. What's the worst that could happen?
I literally was just rolling on the ground and said to her 'this is what dying looks like'
LISTEN TO ME! GAY. FIREFIGHTER. They are the most rare and precious kind of gay. The kind little gays dream of. It needs to happen.
Wait is this black Chris #1, cocaine Chris, or gay Chris?
No this is saxophone Chris
she is like a cock bee. instead of going from flower to flower she goes from cock to cock
I'm floating on a 30mph cloud right now not giving a fuck
My dad told me I would need to be my mom's DD tonight. So, that's how my Easter weekend is going down.
They weren't kidding when they said "Go Army Strong." Best sex I ever had.
whoevers yellow car is in your driveway right now... i plan to steal. just an FYI
Woke up went to work ate beef after three year hiatus shat my pants went to bed
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