I'm trying to bond with my sister... Its like getting to know a person I never met that I don't like
Applied 4 a nanny job usin a Legit Site. Xplain to me how the couple I found offered me a 3some complete with 'sexy pics' of the wife blowin hubby. wtf?
obviously you're part succubus.
Abby. I can text perfectly. I pledge allegiance to the flag of the united states of america. and to the republic, for which we stand, one nation under god indivisible and with liberty and justice for all god bless america
he just asked me for a tag team. like at least let me get changed out of your roommates clothes from last night first...
I'm confused are we getting high or did someone actually die?
Like lay upon bear skin rugs, drink brandy and reminisce of the yesteryear's before a majestic fire place? Because those are my plans.
Currently smoking a blunt with my one night stand's mom. I don't know how I should feel about this.
And we won't even have to pay the tab if we die AT the bar. So..win win.
Cat. Why do you sit on things I need to use.
Because it is cat.
I'M NOT READY TO BE AB ADULT YET!!!
Would it be crossing a line if I told him that I now know his girlfriend has a huge mole on her left ass cheek?
Someone the age of your son tried to go home with me from the bar last night
You need to somehow incorporate the phrase "these hoes ain't loyal" into your best man speech.
I hooked up with a blind guy last night... he's clapping in order to find his way around our apartment
WELL THEN WHAT DAY IS IT?!?! This whole having to choose between ruining my future and ruining my liver is totally killing my vibe
Randomize