We owe the rent and you're unemployed...you're in no financial position to flirt with cocaine addiction.
We had sex on my friends waterbed ..after that the whole school kept asking him if he had fun getting "sea-sick" last night.
"The juvenile turned and faced the officer, unzipped his pants, placed a fresh cigarette in between his legs and preceded to light it with a match"
I'd like to be considered more than just his fuck buddy thanks. IVE BEEN RISKING PREGNANCY FOR SEVEN GODDAMN MONTHS I DESERVE THE TITLE OF GIRLFRIEND
Hey. Be honored that I consider you the genital expert. I know alot of candidates for the position.
My mom just made me promise her that i'll care about the next guy I sleep with
I had sex on a sidewalk in downtown Chicago... I don't think I have anymore morals to lose.
turns out it took a Belgian couchsurfer dressed as Heisenberg to rock my world.
My sister just showed me a snap chat that I don't remember sending, it was a picture of me with two big macs in my bra with just the words "BURGER TITS"
I've officially dedicated my newly single life to making myself squirt.
I can't tell if this is a hangover or just a perfect combination of shame and regret
my god I love twenty year old dicks
I literally forgot every French word I knew and blurted out “mange moi” so he went down on me like I was some baguette fresh outta the oven!!!! I passed out.
I would like to reiterate that I went to give lessons and ended up having a three way instead
It seems I've entered my 21st birthday the same way I entered this world: naked, crying and smothered in someone else's bodily fluids...
Randomize