Please explain to me what this has to do with my fantasy to fuck larry king?
there were no ball for pong so he bought cat toys..... they had bells in them
Im drunk and they're making me play quiet game. Im scared. Baptists are here
But you wanna know what the sadest part is? I had to smoke on the way back home cause my mom would be suspicious if I wasn't high after I was supposedly hanging out with you.
She is just riding on my slutty coat tails.
Just caused a nice traffic jam while trying to park at Costco. Too high to drive.
It's all good, I've hated people for lesser reasons than being my ex boyfriend's favorite pro athlete of all time
Literally had to stick my hands in my pants and hold my butt cheeks together while driving
We had sex during an intermission, then the second period. The bruins better win. Missing a period isn't worth having sex with him
I think the worst was the guy who sent me YouTube videos about how age doesn't matter, and then a link for natural breast enhancements. Kill me.
Trusting in Jesus is not a viable birth control plan.
He's stripped out of his boxers and is dancing and slapping his dick with string cheese...I don't know whether to call for help or take a video.
that may or may not have been my penis.
I’m going to fail his daughter so she stays in my class and I can keep fucking him. BEST. ORGASMS. EVER.
Then you can teach the kid to be a home wrecker
I was supposed to see Marcus tonight and he cancelled. Listen, I shaved my butt hole. Somebody is getting this WAP 😂😂😂😂
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