When we talk. Remind me of these topics, photoshop, my bday, threesomes, and cherekee indians. I swear these are real topics...
New topics to add when we talk, sweden, boxing, and the band journey
Stop everything. They have oreo straws to drink milk with and then you eat the straw. I think i just got turned on by a cookie commercial.
I just gift wrapped bread.
After the VIP Latina experience at the strip club last night, I am rooting for Mexico in this years World Cup.
At least we kept it together. It's people like him who yell at bushes that give acid a bad name
They'd unbutton the overalls with their lesbian-tongues. It wouldn't even be a problem.
I never thought your mom would see me throwing up on my hands and knees in your front yard
According to FB I fucked in a field 365 days ago.
We should celebrate the resignation of Berlusconi tonight with too many bottles of wine and sambuca. We're allies, right?
So I'm dropping a fat deuce at work, and the lock on the stall door slips and the door slides open, when suddenly someone comes in. Now I have two options, I can either get up quickly and try to shut the door quickly (not easy to do with one hand) or I can just sit there and play it off like it's no big deal and I always dump at work with the door open. I chose option two, and it was as awkward as it sounds.
Gonna play a drinking game called drink til I feel my emotions. The things I do so I can be a therapist
The only word that describes how much hair I shaved off of my ass is "considerable".
You gave me a bottle of tequila and introduced me to a ginger named cowboy. I actually love you.
This weekend I turned down sex to watch the Star Wars marathon... Is this growing up?
He passed out while I was riding him but stayed hard long enough for me to orgasm. He definitely earned the blow job I’m going to wake him up with in the morning!
Randomize
