just fucked my old babysitter, gotta love block parties
You couldve had sex with 2 drunk chicks on an alligator slide.
She came in to my room half naked at 3am asking me if I had seen the movie balls deep 7
When I sent you a text telling you to splash water on your face, you texted me back with 'Iwehre N qyull.'
It's official, no more fat chicks or even close to that, my balls are 2 dimentional
the parade is in 5 days. put your big boy pants on and come to beer training. time to build your tolerance. i can't have you passing out in a bush with a cape on again this year.
I was looking at your puke while I was peeing in it the next morning and that ceasar salad did not treat you well
Just smoked pot with a guy who has apparently been living in the woods for over a month. He just walked out of the woods. This is not real life.
Dude, I'm pretty sure I slept with my TA's girlfriend
got into a verbal altercation with Luke Harangoty last night over a table. Called him a cross-eyed fuck and got the table.
nobody was home so I boiled the dildo
A penis isn't a time share. I want to own not rent.
Youre saying I should leave him? Have you seen the dating pool these days? It's terrifying, and in the capital region it's straight Norman Bates
Last night I had a dream that a man with an ice cream body entered a bicycle throwing contest and won.
I need to find a divorced guy with a boat and let my tits do the talking
Randomize
