ok shes still asleep, should i pee on her and say she did it herself? and by the time you respond to this ill probably have already made the decision
even a "fuck you" would be nice at this point.
We fucked on top of all of our English papers in celebration of the semester ending.
You missed out on a serious adventure. Cops were called. We put a chicken in someones house.
The guys had to come into the bar bathroom and pep talk us all off the floor
I just realized. my grades aren't ready for st patties day...
dude i woke up sitting indian style with my face on the ground and my hand in a bucket of ice.
He wears a hat. All the time. Even during sex. And I'm okay with that.
This has been the biggest binge-drinking season of the decade.
When my parents ask if I met any nice guys in California, I'm going to answer, "No, but I have gone home with alot of nice girls". Too much, too soon?
My life has come to reading articles about dating an ex heroin addict. I'm doing well.
It's a lube slip n slide down the hallway now. Details later.
Trying to stay sober at a family function but hiccuping so fucking loud. "Have you been drinking?" I hit on my cousin so yeah. I have been drinking.
I don't know what she did to me last night, but the scratches on my back indicate that I had sex with a Bengal tiger last night.
I think part of my soul drowned in beer and/or jack daniels last night.
Randomize
