I want to bang chis in dee ass burt he be hating on me times two. Me be tryin ti love onu
Bendover
At the Phils game. My gay buddy just wanted up to a bunch of Mets fans and said "I'm gay, and even I think Mets fans are a bunch of fags." I love this fuckin town.
Exactly. I don't do penetration on the first date. Blowjobs however are perfectly acceptable.
I encourage the greeting beej. It determines if the dick is worth keeping around.
I drank gravy. I actually drank gravy. This is heaven.
We watched a biography of Frida Kahlo in class today. It was depressing. A chick with a UNIBROW just put my sex life to shame.
it's been dubbed the summer of antibiotics
could you please explain to me why my jumper cables are on my bedroom floor?
You've been drinking wine and eating bacon all afternoon. HOW IS THAT DOING GOOD?!?!
Im making gravy in a lace bra and jeans. Just call me the southwern wet dream
Now I don't feel so bad about telling everyone that he's 23 and needs Viagra. It's her problem now
Drinking heavily at 3pm and about to rescue a 30lb street turtle. Dont even bother attempting to rise to this level bitch
Just by hearing the girl outside reciting the info on her fake ID, I know it's gonna be a good night
I know we're not on great terms here, but I need to know if you're still available for sexual activity...cause if not I need to get going on a work-out plan.
I thought he was hot. You know, in a “I’ve gone batshit insane and want blood for the blood god” sort of way.
He ate me out in the warehouse on a pallet of sunlight soap. I fucking love night shift!
Randomize
