Words of Wisdom: ordering a pitcher of whiskey cokes, putting a straw in it, and calling it your drink is not socially acceptable
I saw his dick soo much last night when I saw him this morning all I saw was penis where his face should be
we were holding hands throwing up into the same garbage can; if thats not true love i dont know what is .
i wish i was a boy too so i knew what a blow job felt like
I've reached the point to where my pre-gaming needs to be limited to pre-inning-ing
There is only one good excuse for how sore I am right now. And that is incredibly acrobatic sex. Unfortunately for me that is not my excuse.
just reminessing about the wedding and were they seriously to tight to serve a meal oorrrrrr was it just another one of my black-out-by-dinner drunks
the fact that you actualy have a 'black-out-by-dinner drunk' is a bit deserving..
I lull them into a false sense of security with my gayness. Then when they're vulnerable, I strike, like a snake. A big non-gay snake, with huge balls.
Dude, we apparently put a washing machine drum in that back of your truck with the full intention of making a bonfire in it.
The drunk people on this bus are singing Journey songs. This is the whitest thing I've ever experienced
Please keep in mind you are asking relationship advice from a girl who fucked a guy just because we have the same name. Just keep that in mind.
The other day, he sent me a snapchat of his dick in the forest. He captioned it "nature nudes."
According to timehop today marks the 3rd anniversary of my 1st blackout
no its a draw, weve been through this, when were keeping score on getting laid i get a plus 1 handicap each week because of your British accent! its only fair!
You are hungover. Your arguments are irrational an incoherent. We only played twice. Have some Gatorade and take a knee.
Randomize
