if your dad confronts the dude you fucked about the background check he did on him, NOT GONNA GET A CALL BACK
No idea how I passed that sobriety test.
he just booty called me in advance instead of waiting til 3 am when hes trashed. i think thats really considerate and gentlemanlike.
Who would have thought google would have HELPED me fail a test...not pass...thank you pacman, thank you google....
you were upstairs in your room looking out your window and saw him puking in your bushes outside. you then proceeded to open the window and sing Come To My Window
So what's today's forecast for the female rollercoaster you've been riding?
I also just told a guy I was available for counseling in case he needed to 'bang' things out. I've become a monster.
And then he serenaded me with "Pimps don't cry" from 'The Other Guys'. If that's not love I'm not sure what is
Fuck I am so excited for the first time I can make someone call me Doctor Nikki during sex after I finish my PhD
Looks like I've become the Walter White of my PhD cohort.
the problem is i have six tabs of acid in my freezer and no self control
i took a magical journey through the park for about two hours. it was amazing and everything was fantastical. i have been informed someone babysat me through that shit.
He fucked me so well and hard that the couch slid into the Christmas tree. I had to pull branches out of my hair.
I can feel the shame as I walk down your hallway.. good night
Boredom is so much more tolerable when you're stoned off your ass.
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