): 100 percent naked, unless you count a tiara as clothing.
but there are maragaritas for $3 so that was all i needed to hear
The future queen of Norway was pregnant with a druglord's baby when she met the prince. We still have hope.
You'd be so proud. I have the flu/sore throat, so I've tied a scarf around my head and I'm microwaving jagerbombs. Let it never be said I'm not commited.
It's a gateway drink.... Starts with wine... Then I wake up in my car with mascara on my arms covered in french fries...
Drunk puking in my bathtub has plugged it up for the third time this year. I hate these calls to my landlord.
I may be in the process of acquiring a second male fuck buddy and dating a girl....FUCKING STOP THE TRAIN I'M ON! THIS IS NOT A DRILL!!
Note to self: do not ride giant beanbag chair down stairs.
Just picked up an ounce of keif and if it goes to waste before the world ends I'm gonna haunt the shit out of somebody when we all die.
But in fairness, I would totally have a robo-penis as long as it had full sensation.
Note to self: don't try to shave your legs when sex-sore. You CANT reach, stop trying.
To be honest, waking up to 20 naked people in my house was not the weirdest thing to happen to me in the past 24 hours
The power of my boobs compel you
Hey, I'm 22. I'm allowed to have a sex life and you're going to hear about it.
There might be a dead possum in your bed, your roomate is extremely distressed!
Randomize
