You know im sick of people that are still obsessed w obama. that was sooooo last year
She was walking with the authority that 2 beers gave to a light weight.
She just wrapped her tongue around my thumb.....lizard girl may be my next wife.
I am at a striph cluv. They are ovealls everywhere. I have hot rock botto.
you have to be so drunk to ignore a taser
I just want you to know that if I ever had to fight man eating flowers or flying turtles to save my friends they'd be fucked. No one's worth all that bullshit. PS I really need to stop playing Wii while drunk.
I cant wait for your democrat phase to be over.
He was supposed to take me to a nice dinner, but istead all he did was get drunk and throw lit fireworks at me.
And in my birthday dress, with my friends, i peed on myself in line for the club. Still went in and partied. I remember pieces
do you know how much drugs we can buy now that you got that raise at work
Was I asleep on the ride home?
Yea, then when I tried to hold your head up on a turn, you round house punched me in the face.
Can I just lay in bed and you pour vodka through a funnel in my mouth?
Hey, it's all about finding the bright side. And boobs are definitely a bright side.
Fuck you guys, I'm trying to nurse my hangover and eat my chicken tenders in peace.
I felt the need to set off fireworks in the living room while they were having sex upstairs. Yes, they quieted down.
Randomize
